last night was not a good one again but its ok because I know that I am getting close to a break through in my life and that is why I have been tested and pushed around by the enemy but you know what I have learned is that what ever doesn’t kill you will make you stronger. I know that my life is just starting I am 30 years old some people burley think about settling down and having kids at this age and I am already over all that. I do know this I have a bitterness in my heart right now and I am very angry and I do not want to be that way I feel that I need to be though right now I will leave these walls up until I feel safe again and I really do not know when that will be. I feel like the only thing I have control of right now in my life is the eating and exercising part of my life because I am the only one who can control what I do and what I eat. As for everything else I am feeling that I am not in any control and that is an awful feeling! But I know God is doing something in my life I just have to be patient and have faith beyond all understanding and beyond all feelings because feelings can not be trusted!
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